The grass is green on all sides

Want to know how to destroy a party?

Just turn on the TV to a football match.

No football on? Any match will do.

Just turn on the TV and watch the fun.

The other day I was at what was supposed to be a party

But it quickly became a get-together to watch the football match.

Arsenal v/s MU. Or some such nonsense.

With seven or eight faces, basically the entire male population, glued to the television.

Not that men make for the most scintillating company most of the times.

But at this particular soiree, the only times you even saw who these blessed souls were, was when the smell of herbed chicken wafted out and the guys absentmindedly put out a hand for a wing or two.

Even this interest in food was grudging, mind you. Conditional on their level of elation or disappointment with their team.

Whoever said that the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach obviously did not have television!

Then there is cricket.

Ever been out with a guy whose eyes are fixed a foot above your head.
Yes, I did say above. This is a new age guy.
All he is interested in is the match playing on a big screen behind you.

As if one dayers, world cups, test matches were not enough,
now we also have 20-20 to contend with.

Let me not even talk about tennis. Pool. Poker.

Or even farming games.

The other night Kim and I were trying to find a pattern in this male madness and we stumbled on this profound insight.

Green. Green Grass.

Speaking of grass … but let me not digress.

It can spoil a party.

Ruin a new haircut.

Put paid to dinner or

Or your night out.

Green is the common enemy.

And it’s not even ‘on the other side’ anymore.